Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
