Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
