I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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