can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
