Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Randomize
