for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Randomize
