STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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