Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Sober January is a disaster.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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