Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I forget how to act sober
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize