i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize