Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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