Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
