Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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