just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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