Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
