get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize