so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
