I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Randomize
