im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
