What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
My feet surprised me
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