your room smells of hookers.
And success
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
