UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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