I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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