ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
