Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
