are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize