So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
