im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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