That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize