even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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