I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
You're earring is so big in my mouth
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Im just a social blackout drinker.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Randomize
