does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
