I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
