big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
