Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
