I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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