awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
