Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
