wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
