I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
So many bounce houses so little time
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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