So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
