Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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