When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Randomize
