it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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