You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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