Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
how drunk are you?
Several
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
