How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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