Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
