Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
