After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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